This is Danilo's story
"I would never have imagined how positively people reacted."
Danilo was relieved after he came out as gay. His grandmother in particular offers him a lot of support. But unfortunately he has also had some negative experiences.
Danilo likes boys. He already knew that in year 5. At the time, it felt completely normal to him. But at some point he realised that it didn't seem so normal after all. Queer people often reach this point before they come out. They realise: I'm different!
"Until I was 14, I had problems with myself."
Danilo couldn't understand why he didn't feel the way his friends did. His inner coming out was difficult for him. But that is important. Only then can he come out publicly.
At the age of 15, he had his first date with a boy. He was asked about it in an online chat with his closest friends: "Are you gay?" Danilo's heart was racing. He felt totally insecure. But if he couldn't come out to his best friends, who else could he come out to? He plucked up his courage and came out: "Yes, I'm gay!"
Grandma gives him strength
The reactions were positive. Danilo would not have expected that and it gave him courage. Danilo's grandmother in particular is an important anchor in the family.
"No matter what: Danilo will always be our grandchild."
Heidi, Danilo's grandmother
Danilo's grandmother emphasises how important talking to each other is for LGBTIQ families. After all, young people need to feel loved and at home in the family.
Unfortunately, Danilo has already had some unpleasant experiences. When he was 15, he was spat at when he was out with his boyfriend at the time. For this reason, it is also important to Danilo to be able to defend himself in an emergency. That's why he does various sports, such as bouldering, to stay fit.
Experiences of discrimination are unfortunately a reality for many LGBTIQ people. That's why it's important to know what you can do in such cases.
Nevertheless, Danilo feels liberated since coming out. "When it was out, it was like a stone falling from my heart. I'm free now. I am me and people know that now. And that's ok."
Danilo's story shows:
"I'm gay - and that's a good thing." In the video, Danilo reports how surprisingly positively many people have reacted and how important the love of his family, especially his grandma, is to him.
More on the topic of coming out
Coming out is a big step for many people - regardless of their age. It can take courage, but it also brings freedom, clarity and often a new sense of self-determination.
You are not alone: many people have similar experiences to Rolf. And there is support available - whether you are just thinking about coming out or are already in the middle of the process.
On mycomingout.com you will find tips, personal stories, counselling services and information about coming out.
Need someone to talk to?
Whether before, during or after coming out - sometimes it helps to talk to someone.
Use the Gay Health Chat - the button at the bottom right will accompany you on the page. There you get anonymous and free of charge:
- Personal live advice in the chat
- Help by e-mail or telephone
- Information on coming out, sexuality, health and more
