Wenn Blicke alles sagen
There is sometimes that wonderful moment when eyes meet. The eyes you look into start to sparkle and shine. The other person's face appears harmonious and bright. The corners of your own mouth and the wrinkles around your eyes begin to twitch slightly. You can't see yourself, but you can feel that you are sending exactly the same signal. A connection is made that sometimes only lasts a fraction of a second, but opens the door to so much more. Without knowing anything about the other person, neither preferences nor taboos, you know that something can work together. The fact that almost everything is still in the dark makes it exciting. It is clear that you still have to go on a search and discover each other, but also that the search will be successful. Curiosity about each other spreads easily, warming and tingling throughout the body.
Eine Begegnung in der Schwulensauna
I had one such encounter in the south of France. More precisely, in a gay sauna in Bordeaux. I was on my way to the changing rooms because I actually wanted to leave. He was standing in the shower and I only saw him from behind. The water ran down his broad, hairy back to a beautiful, plump arse, where it got stuck and finally dripped to the floor. Just before I turned the corner, he turned round and we were connected. It struck like lightning and was gone just as quickly. I stopped a few steps away and took a few minutes to come down. I felt drained, as if after a heavy high. I didn't realise what it was, but I wanted more of this feeling.
Wenn aus Blickkontakt Verlangen wird
Of course I went back, I had no other choice. I was sure that he was waiting for me somewhere. Not because I thought I was particularly beautiful, sexy or horny - that's always a question of taste - but because I knew that he felt the same way I did. It wasn't about me being desirable per se, nor was it about him being desirable. It was about him meeting me and me meeting him. This chemistry is only triggered by the right combination.
He was lying in a half-darkened cubicle, in a slightly reddish light. With his back against the wall, his big belly and massive thighs looked even more attractive. The situation made me horny, because this is exactly the type of guy I fancy. But it was only when I looked at his face that the intense feeling of connection returned. I couldn't see the smile across his mouth because of his full beard, but the tightening skin around his eyes spoke for itself. I accepted this invitation and locked the door behind me.
Ohne gemeinsame Sprache, aber mit Verlangen
Our faces were now in front of each other, our gazes were deep and he said a few sentences in French. I didn't understand a word and my language skills were only good enough to reply with a moaning "Ouiiiiii!" before we kissed. I could have changed the lyrics of a popular song at the time to "Je ne parle pas français, but please keep fucking!". We made out for quite a long time and kept taking breaks to look at each other. Suddenly he turned me round and, as if this beefy daddy I was now lying under wasn't gift enough, he gave me a gentle, almost tender slap in the face. He fixed me with his gaze and waited until I understood: "Oh, Oui!"
Meine erste Sadomaso Erfahrung
Bisher hatte ich mich noch nie von einem Mann schlagen lassen. Er schlug mich mit der Zeit immer fester, packte härter zu, fickte heftiger rein und quälte mich auf angenehme, erregende Weise, indem er mit Geschwindigkeit, Stellungen und Stärke spielte und diese variierte. Es war meine erste Sadomaso Erfahrung – und was für eine.
Wenn Dominanz Vertrauen schafft
Ich setzte das „Oui!“ im Verlauf des Abends eher spielerisch ein, wir brauchten keine Worte, um miteinander zu kommunizieren. Die Blicke reichten und das, was in ihnen lag, gab mir das Gefühl geborgen zu sein und getragen zu werden. Ich vergaß alles um uns herum und war völlig fokussiert auf den Fluss, in dem wir uns befanden. Es gab keine Grenze, die er hätte überschreiten können, denn auf wundersame Art schien er zu wissen, wie weit er gehen und mich bringen konnte. Er erkannte, was ich brauchte und gab es mir. Er erkannte mich. Genauso war es umgekehrt. Selbstbestimmt zu entscheiden, dass mich Männer schlagen und dominieren dürfen, macht mich heiß. Bei gutem Sex fühle ich mich gesehen, angenommen und zugehörig.
Sex ist für mich die eindrücklichste Möglichkeit, gezeigt zu bekommen, dass ich in Ordnung bin. Eindrücklich, weil es für manches keine Worte gibt oder braucht, aber durch den Einsatz unserer Körper trotzdem kommuniziert werden kann. Okay, weil ich mich mit meinem Innersten zeige, hingebe und anvertraue und das Gegenüber mich und meine Bedürfnisse anerkennt und sie sogar erfüllt. Es ist eine wechselseitige Erlaubnis dafür. In diesem wunderbaren Moment in Bordeaux haben ich und der unbekannte Mann uns nicht nur gesehen und erkannt, sondern darüber hinaus gespürt, dass unsere eigenen Puzzleteile zusammenpassen.
