Gay. Trans*. Part of the scene!

The brochure "Gay. Trans*. Part of the scene!" offers gay trans* and cis men, gender-nonconforming and non-binary people who feel they belong to the gay community, including all information on respectful behaviour within our diverse scene, gay sex and protection against HIV (Safer sex). Brief information on the Trans*-History and important activists as well as links to more information round off the brochure.

It is therefore a reference work that is unique in this form in the German-speaking world.

Online live talk on the International Transgender Day of Visibility

"Online live talk on the International Transgender Day of Visibility
On the "International Transgender Day of Visibility" on Tuesday, 31 March 2020, the editorial team presented the new brochure of the ICH WEISS WAS ICH TU campaign "Schwul. Trans*. Part of the scene!" at an online live talk. You can watch the discussion again here."

Trans* Coming Out

Coming out is also for trans* people an important experience. So diverse trans* Biographies are as diverse as the coming-out experiences associated with them. With the following three short reports, we want to present the different perspectives: KAy reports on his inner trans* Coming out, cis man Till gives an insight into how he became a trans* coming out and Alexander describes his experiences with the outside world. trans* Coming out.

Transition

Transition means the harmonisation of trans* people to their actual gender. To put it bluntly, it means making visible to the outside world what has long been clear on the inside. Transition is usually a process that lasts for years - which for the trans* person can be very challenging. This can be divided into three typical levels:
Social, medical and legal transition. You can find out what these look like in detail in our blog post.

Trans* and safer sex

The bodies of trans* Men are diverse. So is the sex they have with other men. There are only a few differences to cis Gays. Protection against HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases is a priority for trans* like cis gays are therefore basically the same: On the pages on Safer sexProtection through therapyPEP and PrEP The knowledge centre has all the important information. The following is also good to know:

 Active! Passive! Fucking as trans* Man

Also trans* Men actively fuck. It doesn't matter whether the cock has grown hormonally (enlarged clitoris), whether it is a surgical clitoris penoid or a phalloplasty, or whether a strap-on has been purchased: The condom is the easiest way to protect yourself from HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases. Alternatively, a femidom can also be used. The femidom is currently considered the safest option for those who have undergone metaidioplasty (a Kind genital surgery) to create a clitoral penis period.

Never use the same condom from the Anus to the front hole (of many trans* men's chosen designation) should be used, as Bacteria of the rectum can cause infections there.

Should passive trans* men have sex via the front hole, the condom also protects against HIV, other sexually transmitted diseases or unwanted pregnancy. Even if testosterone is taken trans* men remain fertile in principle (as long as the uterus and ovaries have not been removed; see hysterectomy with adnexectomy).

Important for trans* men who have anal sex as well as fronthole sex and take PrEP:

  • The top-up phase lasts 7 days, 1 tablet per day.
  • Then continue with 1 tablet daily.
  • After the last fronthole sex, take 1 tablet daily for at least 7 to a maximum of 28 days.
    Discuss the exact duration with your doctor.

For Anal sex According to the European and German-Austrian guidelines of the medical associations, occasion-related PrEP is also possible, but not for fronthole sex.

In the medical harmonisation phase

Long-term treatment with testosterone enlarges or lengthens the clitoris in most women. trans* men considerably. Some trans* Men have the clitoris built up into a clitoral penoid. During the healing process, infections are generally more easily possible here. This applies to all infections - including HIV, other sexually transmitted diseases and fungi. It therefore makes particular sense to look out for injuries in this area.

When removing the mammary glands and creating a male breast (mastectomy), it is also advisable to pay attention to possible injuries during the healing process, as Bacteria and viruses can penetrate there more easily.

Trans* Men can have elevated liver values during testosterone treatment. If you decide to take PrEP or require PEP, it is advisable to ask your doctor to what extent these methods are suitable for you.

A final word ...

When it comes to sex and sexual practices, it is important to find a self-determined and self-confident way of dealing with your own sexuality, to show and respect boundaries and to say "no" from time to time. Incidentally, this applies to trans* Men as well as for cis Men.

The information on this page is based on 'Transmen: Trans Health Matters', which was created by Terrence Higgins Trust was published.

You can find detailed explanations of the terms mentioned here in our trans* Glossary at the bottom of this page.

FAQ

In general ...
Respectful behaviour and good communication should always go hand in hand. Many questions are allowed as long as they are formulated respectfully. Towards a trans* This means respecting his identity in all questions. Questions about his "former self" should not be asked during the first exchange. Questions about genitalia are also a "no-go". If a trans* If a man does not want to answer a question, this should be respected. Not everyone trans* Man constantly wants to answer educational questions on the subject. When in doubt, it helps to ask yourself whether the question really provides any insight.

Basically, the bodies of trans* men are just as individual and different as the bodies of cis Men. Everyone can decide for themselves to what extent they want to harmonise their body hormonally and surgically. The only thing that matters is that you feel comfortable. Many trans* Men aim to have a male breast (mastectomy). There are trans* Men with a penoid structure (imitation of a penis) or a "clitpen" (clitoris penoid). Other trans* Men do not have any gender reassignment surgery in the genital area and still have a front hole (from trans* men selected designation). Packer

The question will be trans* Man has a different answer for himself. It's good to free yourself from the images projected by the media or those that have been modelled in your social environment for generations. It is important to remain true to yourself and not try to conform to any clichés or slip into a role that you cannot identify with.

The possibilities are for trans* Men just as diverse as for gay men cis Men: from dating portals to cafés and clubs - there are many places where you can meet someone. The much more important question is: when and how do I come out? The online world offers different possibilities than real life. If you like it and are already self-confident, you can present yourself in a dating profile as trans* come out. On the one hand, this can make contact easier, but on the other hand, such openness does not always protect against verbal abuse. But: On the whole, it is almost impossible to avoid assaults online. All users are probably aware of this. One way to counteract this can be to describe your own profile as well as possible in order to minimise the scope for misinterpretation.

"How and when do I say that I trans* am?" - This is a question that every trans* Man before a date with a cis man has ever asked. There is no standard answer or obligation to come out right from the start! Everyone decides for themselves when to come out. The Trans*-Being is only one aspect of the trans* Man. Dating is all about getting to know each other for the first time. When the time comes, it's best to talk about it as naturally as possible. Under no circumstances should it be presented as a problem, otherwise it could actually become one for the other person. It is advisable to play with open cards at the latest before you become intimate with someone. The reactions of cis Men on a Trans*-Outing can be very different. Basically, it is likely that the cis man easier if he knows about the date before the date. Trans*-Aspect knows. Forced outings by third parties are a real "no-go" in any case!

Trans* Men are men - and when a cis man and a trans* Man fall in love or have sex with each other, then they are just as gay like two cis Men or two trans* Men who come together. It doesn't matter what stage of transition someone is in - the important thing is to respect the person and their sexual and gender identity. Nevertheless, for some cis men that their gay identity starts to "wobble" when they decide in favour of a trans* Man interested. In this case the cis man think about it: "Why?" Often it has to do with his own ideas of masculinity and less with the trans* Man he is interested in. The trans* Men are often used as a projection surface for the identity crises of their counterparts. In this sense, masculinity and gayness are multifaceted and do not hang between the legs.

Having responsible and respectful sex is important for everyone. Gender roles can also play a role, depending on desire and type. No one should be assigned a sexual or gender role from the outside in advance. Unfortunately, this happens trans* Men often do. So many trans* Men are automatically seen as passive and/or in the submissive role. Trans* However, men can just as easily have a hormonally grown penoid, an erection or use dildos. The best way to find out is to explore the bodies together.

From cuddly sex, oral and anal sex to BDSM, there is something for everyone. trans* Everything is possible with gay sex. Simply go on a discovery tour. Do what you like. It's as simple as that.

Darkroom

Sometimes trans* men may not be granted access to the darkroom before a transition. In order to avoid such unpleasant situations on site, it is advisable to ask the venue operator in advance what their policy is on dealing with trans* men. trans* Care for customers. Even after transitioning, it can still take courage to enter the darkroom. Once you're in, blow jobs can be an option at first to familiarise yourself with this new place and gay sex. That way, you don't have to be trans* out. Placing your hand protectively in front of the crotch/packer can help to avoid unwanted contact and protect your trans* not having to reveal their identity immediately. This "having to hide" causes some people to trans* Men, however, tend not to use darkrooms. A more open Trans*-Welcome policy on the part of the club operators and cis Men would be desirable here.

Cruising in public places

What applies to the darkroom also applies to cruising areas - only without the door policy. Perhaps blowing bubbles can help you to familiarise yourself with the location and situation. However, it is important to remember that you are left to your own devices when cruising. If an attack occurs, it is rather difficult to find allies. This is the advantage of a cruising bar with a darkroom.

Gay saunas

Before visiting a gay sauna, it is advisable to check the operator's policy on trans* customers who, for example, have scars on their upper body or no penis build-up. By calling the management, you cannot rule out the possibility of encountering intolerant sauna guests, but at least you can clarify whether the sauna staff are aware of your personal hygiene requirements. trans* customers is sensitised and, if necessary, takes sides for trans* customers if there are any unpleasant disputes with other guests.

Basically, the bodies of trans* men are just as individual and different as the bodies of cis men. Everyone can decide for themselves to what extent they want to harmonise their body hormonally and surgically. The only thing that matters is that they feel comfortable. Many trans* men strive to achieve a male breast (mastectomy). There are trans* men with a penoid reconstruction (replica of a penis) or a "clitpen" (clitoris penoid). Other trans* men do not have any gender reassignment surgery in the genital area and still have a front hole (a term chosen by trans* men). Packer

Every trans* man will answer this question differently for himself. It is good to free yourself from the images that are projected by the media or that have been modelled in your social environment for generations. It is important to remain true to yourself and not try to conform to any clichés or slip into a role that you cannot identify with.

The options are just as varied for trans* men as they are for gay cis men: from dating portals to cafés and clubs - there are many places where you can meet someone. The much more important question is: when and how do I come out? The online world offers different opportunities than real life. If you like and are already self-confident, you can come out as trans* in a dating profile. On the one hand, this can make contact easier, but on the other hand, such openness does not always protect you from verbal abuse. But: On the whole, it is almost impossible to avoid assaults online. All users probably know this. One way to counteract this can be to describe your profile as well as possible in order to minimise the scope for misinterpretation.

"How and when do I say that I'm trans*?" - This is a question that every trans* man has asked himself before a date with a cis man. There is no standard answer or obligation to come out right from the start! The timing is up to you. Being trans* is only one aspect of being a trans* man. Dating is all about getting to know each other for the first time. When the time comes, it's best to talk about it as naturally as possible. Under no circumstances should it be presented as a problem, otherwise it can actually become one for the other person. At the latest before you become intimate with someone, it is advisable to play with open cards. The reactions of cis men to a trans* coming out can be very different. Basically, it is probably easier for the cis man if he knows about the trans* aspect before the date. Forced outings by third parties are a real "no-go" in any case!

Trans* men are men - and if a cis man and a trans* man fall in love or have sex with each other, then they are just as gay as two cis men or two trans* men who come together. It doesn't matter what stage of transition someone is in - the important thing is to respect the person and their sexual and gender identity. Nevertheless, some cis men find that their gay identity becomes "shaky" when they are interested in a trans* man. In this case, the cis man can think about it: "Why?" It often has to do with his own ideas of masculinity and less with the trans* man he is interested in. The trans* man is often used as a projection surface for the identity crises of his counterpart. In this sense, masculinity and being gay are multifaceted and do not hang between the legs.

Having responsible and respectful sex is important for everyone. Gender roles can also play a role, depending on desire and type. No one should be assigned a sexual or gender role from the outside in advance. Unfortunately, this still often happens to trans* men. Many trans* men are automatically seen as passive and/or in a submissive role. However, trans* men can just as easily have a hormonally grown penoid, an erection or use dildos. The best way to find out is to explore their bodies together.

From cuddly sex, oral and anal sex to BDSM, everything that gay sex involves is possible with trans* men. Simply go on a discovery tour. Do what you like. It's as simple as that.

Darkroom

Sometimes trans* men may not be granted access to the darkroom before a transition. In order to avoid such unpleasant situations on site, it is advisable to ask the operator of the location in advance what their policy is for dealing with trans* customers. Even after transitioning, it can still take courage to enter the darkroom. Once you're inside, blow jobs can be an option at first to familiarise yourself with this new place and gay sex. That way, you don't have to come out as trans* straight away. Putting your hand protectively in front of your crotch/packer can help you to avoid unwanted contact and not have to reveal your trans* identity straight away. However, this "having to hide" causes some trans* men not to use darkrooms. A more open trans* welcome policy on the part of club operators and cis men would be desirable here.

Cruising in public places

What applies to the darkroom also applies to cruising areas - only without the door policy. Perhaps blowing bubbles can help you to familiarise yourself with the location and situation. However, it is important to remember that you are left to your own devices when cruising. If an attack occurs, it is rather difficult to find allies. This is the advantage of a cruising bar with a darkroom.

Gay saunas

Before visiting a gay sauna, it is advisable to clarify the operator's policy with regard to trans* customers who, for example, have scars on their upper body or do not have a penis. By calling the management, you cannot rule out the possibility of encountering intolerant sauna guests, but at least you can clarify whether the sauna staff are sensitised to trans* customers and may take sides with trans* customers if there are any unpleasant disputes with other guests.

Find out more about trans life and the gay community

Whether coming out, transitioning or Safer sex - In Gayzine you will find many exciting blog posts that deal with the topic of Trans* and queer life. Read personal stories, testimonials and helpful information that will strengthen you in your community.

Materials to inform and share

Discover brochures, posters, postcards and other materials relating to Trans* and community topics - to read, share and pass on, whether digitally or in print.